The very Ig Nobel brassier mask. Artist anonymous.
So, Barack Obama won the Nobel Peace Prize “for his extraordinary efforts to strengthen international diplomacy and cooperation between peoples.” This honor has filled some Americans with a surge of pride, others a shot of surprise, and for the majority of world citizens, an undermining suspicion that the Nobel Peace Prize has been devalued. In the same way that one wonders if the son of a former President has been elected on his own merits or connections, we have to wonder: was it Obama’s genius that won the prize or his position? The award does not feel deserved; it is less a celebration of his past achievements and more a confident encouragement for the future. Whatever happened to the American Dream—or the international dream—of not having to be president or royalty in order to win a million bucks and some recognition?
To answer this question, we must look to a different award ceremony that awards a different kind of genius. The Ig Nobel Awards are intended for inventions and discoveries that are “first intended to make you laugh and then think,” according to their website. Although you won’t be inducted into a Royal society or receive comparable prize money as a “real” Nobel Laureate, you can become a member of the Luxuriant Flowing Hair Club for Scientists, provided that you fit the criteria.
Many of the scientists who submit their work to “improbable research” had absolutely no funding from external endorsements. Most of the discoveries are simple and elegant — not the result of arduous years in grad school.
For example, the Public Health Prize was awarded to Dr. Elena Bodnar for inventing a brassiere that, in an emergency, can be quickly converted into a pair of protective masks—one for the brassiere wearer and one to be given to some needy bystander. The genius of this invention lies in the fact that, assuming that the majority of women wear bras (hint hint), and given the fact that 51 percent the world’s population is female, the application of such a product could be nearly universal. Plus, it produces a great new pick-up line: “Hey babe, I have Swine, give me your bra.”
Some researchers combined common sense and ancient practices to form orderly answers that stand up to today’s high-standards. For example Donald L. Unger won the Medicine Award “for investigating a possible cause of arthritis of the fingers, by diligently cracking the knuckles of his left hand—but never cracking the knuckles of his right hand—every day for more than sixty (60) years.” What a trooper.
Similarly, the Veterinary Medicine Award went to Catherine Douglas and Peter Rowlinson “for showing that cows who have names give more milk than cows that are nameless.” Unfortunately, this discovery goes hand-in-hand with the demise of the entertaining game “HEY COW!”
More interestingly, in 2008, the Physics Prize went to Dorian Raymer and Douglas Smith for proving with mathematical knot theory that “heaps of string or hair or almost anything else will inevitably tangle themselves up in knots.” I don’t want to know how, but Geoffrey Miller won the Economics Prize “for discovering that professional lap dancers earn higher tips when they are ovulating.”
Other discoveries, like the fact that potato chips can be electronically modified so as to sound crunchier when chewed, merely prove some of our suspicions about the shadiness of the commercial world. Dan Ariely of Duke University, Rebeca Webar of MIT, Baba Shiv of Stanford University, and Ziv Carmen of Singapore won the Medicine Prize “for demonstrating that high-priced fake medicine is more effective than low-priced fake medicine.”
While many of these problems are ancient and their solutions timeless, others are extremely pertinent to global issues today. This year’s Economics Prize went to the auditors of four Icelandic banks “for demonstrating that tiny banks can be rapidly transformed into huge banks, and vice versa.” In 2008, the Peace Prize was awarded to the Swiss Federal Ethics Committee for adopting a legal principle that plants have dignity. Now that sounds like a real paradigm shift.
The Ig Nobel Awards’ purist philosophy coupled with the Nobel Award’s prestigious regalia could help reinvent our notion of “genius.” Over a century ago, Alfred Nobel thought the Peace Prize was deserved by “the person who shall have done the best work … for the reduction of standing armies.” It’s clear Obama has not taken significant steps to reduce the number of troops in the Middle-East, and therefore does not deserve the Nobel Peace Prize. Although the Nobel Award might be cheapened, the Ig Nobel Awards rewards deserving professors and entities for competent, albeit zany, work.
